WELCOME! What a joy to see y’all here again. Thank you for coming and firing up a few of your dreams here at the dragons’ lair; we promise to handle them with the greatest of care. Or at least I do. How the judges will treat the tales behind the scenes, one can only imagine. (I am, however, keeping a very stern eye out. It’s IR, after all, and Joidianne, as captains this week….)
For today’s prompt pic: on this day in 1431, and just three days past her 19th birthday (January 6, 1412, we think), the judges’ investigations began for the young Jeanne d’Arc‘s trial in Rouen. This gorgeous painting is by Eugène Thirion, who died ten days and one hundred five years ago (January 19, 1910). In this single work of art we have life, death, fire, a simple but fearless maiden, and the whispers of an archangel warrior. Oh, dear writers. So much! So, so much! I can’t breathe.
♦♦♦♦♦
We’re back at the top of the battle boards today, with our first Dragon Captains, Image Ronin & Joidianne taking on the herculean task of judging. Suspense and intrigue way outside the box, says Joidianne; how’s about a bit of scab-pickin’, says Image. Past the surface; beyond the superficial. -Don’t they sound easy to please??
♦♦♦♦♦
Awards Ceremony: Results will post Monday. Noteworthy #SixtySeconds interviews with the previous week’s winner post Wednesdays. I (Rebekah) post my own unbalanced writings sometimes on Tuesdays or Thursdays.
Now, raise your swords and write your fiery stories in the sky.
* Word count: Write a 150-word story (10-word leeway on either side) based on the photo prompt.
* How: Post your story here in the comments. Include your word count (140 – 160 words, excluding title) and Twitter handle if you’ve got one. If you’re new, don’t forget to check the contest guidelines.
* Deadline: 11:59pm ET tonight (check the world clock if you need to; Flash! Friday is on Washington, DC time)
* Winners: will post Monday.
* Prize: The Flash! Friday e-dragon e-badge for your blog/wall, your own winner’s page here at FF, a 60-second interview next Wednesday, and your name flame-written on the Dragon Wall of Fame for posterity.
—NO DRAGON’S BIDDING—WRITE A STORY BASED ON THE PHOTO ALONE—

Jeanne d’Arc, 1876. Painting by Eugène Thirion. Public Domain.
Those Who Hide
by JM6, 160 words, @JMnumber6
“Dad? Why do we Hide?”
“‘To save the myriad voices of the world for future generations.’”
“But why don’t we speak up and make sure those voices are heard *today*?”
The man smiled patiently at his daughter. “Those who fight don’t always win. You remember Jeanne d’Arc?”
“Yeah, she was kick-ass.”
“Heh. Yes, she did many brave things and won several battles. But then she lost and was burned at the stake.”
“I know, but she fought for a just cause instead of Hiding.”
“But who told her story?” the man asked.
“I don’t know.”
“We did. Some people tried to bury her story, saying only the men of France defeated England, not some peasant girl. We were the ones who kept her story alive in people’s minds until they could accept the truth. Had we fought and died with her, who would’ve known her story? Hiding *is* a just cause.”
“Maybe,” the girl said grudgingly. “It’s kinda boring, though.”
LikeLike
“Maybe,” the girl said grudgingly. “It’s kinda boring, though.”” Made me laugh 🙂
LikeLike
I enjoyed the father/daughter moments here; some great true-to-life interactions. This one has a tender feel to it. Nicely done.
LikeLike
Love the conversation in this. Such a natural feel.
LikeLike
Nicely done. I like the last line, too.
LikeLike
As a parent, I appreciate this universal dynamic between a girl and her Dad. Nice work.
LikeLike
Always difficult exploring ‘big’ ideas with kids, you get going with the spiel and then they just shoot you down at the end. Nice story.
LikeLike
The last line made me laugh. I’ve had so many conversations with my kids that ended just like that. This has an authentic, warm feel. Well done.
LikeLike
Tamara Shoemaker
@TamaraShoemaker
Word Count: 158
Taking Risk
Do it.
Risk is the dark voice that fans the tempo of swirling thoughts feathering my mind. I clench my trembling fingers together. The knuckles are white, bloodless.
It’s safer not to.
Security, the angel of light, nudges me—he who has always fed me the voice of reason as he sits in familiar domain, as if he knows me.
Today, he reflects my frailty.
Dive deep; the courage is there.
Risk clutches for my attention. He overrides my insecurities, stamps my fears into the dust. I raise my eyes to the familiar form who sits across the table from me. The gray eyes, their cruelty neatly veiled now, watch me, waiting.
“You ain’t got it in you, baby.”
I release the clench of my knuckles, tug the ring free from its decade long groove.
“I want a divorce.”
The circlet vibrates across the table, settling with its metallic ring a ten year argument with my angels.
LikeLike
Love your writing. This>>> “Risk is the dark voice that fans the tempo of swirling thoughts feathering my mind” is magic.
LikeLike
Thanks, Carlos! 🙂 Glad you enjoyed it. 🙂
LikeLike
Love this! Brilliant work as always 🙂
LikeLike
Thanks, Deb!
LikeLiked by 1 person
She did it! I want to high five her. Great story 🙂
LikeLike
I know, right? I’m so proud of her! So glad you enjoyed it. 🙂
LikeLike
This is some awesomely rich writing. I love this portal of the internal struggle.
LikeLike
Thanks, Casey! I appreciate that so much. 🙂
LikeLike
I was struggling this week to pick my fav from your awesome duo. I’ve now decided this one edges it. Stunning language (which is your standard), but great structure and brilliant ending. Congrats.
LikeLike
Thanks, Mark! Your never-failing encouragement means so much. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is just gorgeous, and the speech really stays in key, great stuff
LikeLike
Thanks, Tam! Sure appreciate that!
LikeLike
Moving, as always. Nicely structured. I like picturing security as an angel – interesting idea!
LikeLike
Thanks, Margaret! 🙂
LikeLike
I love that last line. Enough information in ‘vibrates’ being paired with ‘circlet’ to give the most efficient way of conveying the picture of its motion as it comes to a rest. Coupled with the double meaning of ‘metallic ring’ and I can hear its vibration as it sort of spirals to a stop. Everything is magnified from the significance of that one act in the entire story as it settles ‘a ten year argument with [her] angles’.
Climax. Cathartic resolution for both character and reader. All in one. Now that’s cool, bringing 4 elements all individually powerful and meaningful, but combined to weave together even stronger magic without a ‘waste’ in words. Beautiful, beautiful style!
LikeLike
Thanks so much for your feedback; it’s really great to see how it comes together for the readers. So glad you enjoyed it!
LikeLike
Really nice, poetic piece. I love the “good angel/bad angel” dynamic. Favorite line = “I release the clench of my knuckles, tug the ring free from its decade long groove.”
LikeLike
Thanks so much! I appreciate your kind words. 🙂
LikeLike
As always, a compelling story. “decade long groove” and “a ten year argument with my angels” are lines to savor.
LikeLike
Thanks so much, Michael! 🙂
LikeLike
Love the first line. I also love ‘the decade long groove’. Striking imagery throughout. Your use of language is just always so beautiful. Well done.
LikeLike
Thanks so much, Marie! Your feedback is always appreciated. 🙂
LikeLike
‘Risk is the dark voice that fans the tempo of swirling thoughts feathering my mind’ – love it. The language you’ve used fits perfectly with the story.
LikeLike
Thanks, Steph! So glad you enjoyed it. 🙂
LikeLike
Good for her! “The circlet vibrates across the table, settling with its metallic ring a ten year argument with my angels.” I love this line. It’s so vivid. I can just hear that ring hitting the table, signaling her resolve.
LikeLike
Thanks! I’m so glad that sound was striking; I tried several different sentence variations to get it to where I felt like I could “hear” it. 🙂
LikeLike
Wonderful as always, Tamara. Your gorgeous prose sings throughout the story. But a simple line impacted me the most: “You ain’t got it in you, baby.” Damn. Your tales are a must read every week.
LikeLike
That’s my favorite line too, Chris! See? Great minds! 😉 So glad you liked it. I loved your too. Thanks so much!
LikeLiked by 1 person
@betsystreeter
154 words
A WISH, OR A PROMISE
Brother and sister lie on their backs in the grass.
“What do you think happens when you die?” the boy asks.
The girl turns her head. “I think we have to decide.”
The boy considers this. “Have you picked something, then?”
“Yes,” she says. “When I die, I will become an angel.”
“The kind with wings and a robe?” the boy asks.
“I will come to people in their darkest moment,” the girl says. “I will appear whatever way they wish to see me, and then it will be okay.”
“I like that idea,” the boy says. “I’m going to be an angel, too. I am going to go to sick children.”
“Like me? Will you come to me?” the girl asks.
“Yes, I will come to you in your darkest moment,” the boy says. “I will be there for you, as your angel.”
The girl smiles. Overhead a cloud dissolves into the blue.
LikeLike
Betsy, you made me cry. Gracious. Such a sweet, heart-breaking picture. I need a tissue.
LikeLike
Aw, thanks. Or, sorry. But mostly, thanks!
LikeLike
No need to be sorry. I love a story that makes me cry. 🙂
LikeLike
Beautiful premise and well executed. Very moving.
LikeLike
Thanks very much!
LikeLike
Unique take on the prompt! And what if we could choose…?
LikeLike
Indeed! Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow. The innocence and joy and curiosity of being a child just totally turned on its head. Great job Betsy
LikeLike
Thanks very much!!
LikeLike
Beautiful story and such fine crystal writing. Love this.
LikeLike
Ooh, “crystal writing.” I love that phrase. Thank you!
LikeLike
Lovely work. A great example of how to write perfect micro fiction. I love the ending, which is hopeful despite the circumstances.
LikeLike
Wow, thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lovely story. Beautifully written.
LikeLike
Beautiful, and horribly real
LikeLike
what a sweet piece. Heartstrings are tugged, for sure! 😀
LikeLike
Aah bless. Such a sweet story. 🙂
LikeLike
A lovely story.
LikeLike
This is gorgeous. So bittersweet! So much love between these two, and so much beauty and hope in the face of hardship. Well done.
LikeLike
Tamara Shoemaker
@TamaraShoemaker
Word Count: 159
Transcendent
He doesn’t know me, not well. I doubt he could tell you my name if you asked him. But every morning at 7:14, he breezes in with two coffee cups in his hands, his scarf thrown over his arm instead of around his neck, one corner of his mouth melting into a dimple.
The coffees are for Mrs. Anderson in 3B, with a bad back and a love for white chocolate mocha, and Miss Rice, who hates coffee, but tells him that she loves it because she knows she’ll get an extra visitor most mornings.
I’m the one who drinks it later, hiding behind my desk as I watch him bend over each bed, holding a hand, patting a shoulder, pulling up a chair to look at a picture of a new grandbaby.
How do you tell him?
How to make him see?
How to convince him that a simple girl,
A wisp of earth,
Could love an angel?
LikeLike
I love this. My kind of story.
LikeLike
Me too. This hits the center of my romantic sensibilities. Thanks for the compliment! 🙂
LikeLike
Gorgeous! “Miss Rice, who hates coffee, but tells him that she loves it because she knows she’ll get an extra visitor most mornings” so sad and so sweet all at once.
LikeLike
Thanks again, Deb! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow, this vividly sketches a whole range of characters in an instant. Love.
LikeLike
Thanks, Betsy! Appreciate it! 🙂
LikeLike
As always Tamara…well, you know, as always.
LikeLike
Lol! And as always, your kindness is much appreciated. 😉 Thanks!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love how there is so much said, and not said. I also like the change of structure towards the end. Nicely done FF Champ.
LikeLike
Thanks, Mark! I’m glad you picked up on the not-said portion of the story, ’cause that was my favorite part. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Aw man, there should be a good few more hundred words of this – don’t stop now I’m enjoying it too much 😉 love the voice, and also Miss Rice 😉
LikeLike
Lol! Miss Rice has blossomed in my mind with a few keystrokes. I need to save her for one of my manuscripts or something. 🙂 Glad you enjoyed it! Thanks!
LikeLike
Oh, yeah, OK: this rocks. I’m such a romance junkie. You had me at hello. Er, I mean, you had me with the ending. LOVE IT.
LikeLike
I knew you’d like this one, Margaret; I had a sneaking suspicion. 🙂 Thanks for confirming them! 🙂
LikeLike
So much story and so much humanity in so few words. Well done and inspiring.
LikeLike
Thanks so much! Getting the humanity into my stories has been a struggle; I’m so glad it came through here!
LikeLike
Who wouldn’t fall in love? 🙂 Fave line = “A wisp of earth, Could love an angel?”
LikeLike
Good question. I don’t think there are many who could resist. 😉 Thanks so much!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Another good story, so gently told.
LikeLike
Thanks, Steph! 🙂
LikeLike
I love this! So romantic, and you’ve captured so much about so many characters, so much story, in so few words.
LikeLike
Thanks, Mimi! What a fabulous compliment. I appreciate it! 🙂
LikeLike
“A wisp of earth” wow. Fabulous work yet again, Tamara.
LikeLike
Thanks, Chris. I always love your feedback. 🙂
LikeLike
150 words.
Didn’t mean for it this way.
Didn’t mean for all the blood.
Didn’t mean for all the dead.
No… this isn’t right.
Eat the bread, but don’t forget the cell. Drink the water, but don’t forget the stench. Pace around, but don’t forget the mission.
Sit still. Push away everything. Ignore the rats. Only me now. Pray hard. Reach out. Pray harder. Grasp it… More… More!
…There! The presence! The voice!
Hear it whisper.
“That was not sin.”
Feel its touch.
“If it were, you would not hear me.”
Be embraced.
“Remember who you live for. Remember who judges you.”
Yes… Recall the scene…
Remember the screams, for it was sin. Remember the blood, for it was penance. Remember the regret, for they were lost.
God’s gift to the world. Harsh. Necessary.
This way was meant to be.
The blood was meant to be.
The dead were meant to be.
LikeLike
Sorry, missed out the title.
‘Voice and Vice’
LikeLike
Love the pattern of this, nice and punchy too.
LikeLike
I can picture her pacing in that prison cell. So good. 🙂
LikeLike
This has fantastic sync. “Remember the screams, for it was sin. Remember the blood, for it was penance. Remember the regret, for they were lost.” The repetition packs a punch. Those last three lines are powerful. Great stuff!
LikeLike
Great story about condemnation and salvation as two sides of the same situation. Very deep.
LikeLike
Love the rhythm of this – really carries you through
LikeLike
Thank y’all for the support! I’m up against serious competition here though, and there’s a lot I can learn from everybody, especially with refining my preference for punchy-style writing and how to weave it with more flowy-style structures. Still, It makes me happy that there are others who can feel what I was going for 😀 Again, many thanks 🙂
LikeLike
This reads like a song. Are you a musician? Good message, here.
LikeLike
Only insofar as how words are my notes and scenes are my songs, otherwise I’m not. I’m wondering what kind of tune is in your head as you ‘sing’ it 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Religion the source of so much blood and pain. Strong, powerful writing.
LikeLike
I agree, this has wonderful rhythm. You perfectly captured a sense of restless self-doubt and guilt, and of a desperate clinging to faith and purpose in order to cope. Nicely done.
LikeLike
Great flow to this. Nice.
LikeLike
Wise Men
“I hear voices,” he says and whips his head from side to side. It looks like he hasn’t slept in days, the dark circles under his eyes a deep purple.
“Chill out,” I tell him, grabbing his shoulders. He shakes free and steps backwards.
“I think I’m going schizo.”
“Everyone’s a little schizo.”
“Not like this they ain’t. I can’t go schizo. I’ll lose my job, my friends, my—”
“What exactly do you hear?”
He looks around, paranoia saturating his eyes, and whispers something inaudible through his teeth.
“What?” I say.
“Go to the East. Find the king.” He yells. His face goes white. He runs to the nearest corner and covers his ears with the backs of his hands.
I stare at him. He shifts his body back and forth. I can’t force myself to tell him that I hear the voices too. Instead, I huddle in the corner opposite him and wait for the voices to stop.
@goldzco21
160 words
#flashdog
LikeLike
“I can’t force myself to tell him that I hear the voices too. Instead, I huddle in the corner opposite him and wait for the voices to stop.” Love this twist!
LikeLike
very haunting! Well done!
LikeLike
Oh, what a great retake of the three kings (although I guess there’s no Biblical reference to the number three). I really enjoyed the modern covering of an age-old story. You do a great job of getting inside the characters’; heads I can feel their terror. 🙂 Great job, as always!
LikeLike
Really nice physical descriptions in this one. Very vivid.
LikeLike
I wasn’t expecting the other guy to hear the voices too! Creative!
LikeLike
“I hear the voices too” A phrase that gives me chills no matter who might be saying it. Great story.
LikeLike
Top work, Carlos. Very clever. I think you’ll be in contention.
LikeLike
Thanks all. Love the support and comments.
LikeLike
Dude, you shouldn’t be allowed to stop there 😉 Great stuff
LikeLike
Is it odd to say I enjoyed this? B/c I should feel sorry for him, right? I like the blending of modern psychology with Biblical references.
LikeLike
Nice twist ending – totally didn’t see it coming!
LikeLike
Chilling. Very well paced. Didn’t see it coming.
LikeLike
The voices get to everyone in the end. Like your last paragraph, good twist.
LikeLike
“I can’t force myself to tell him that I hear the voices too. Instead, I huddle in the corner opposite him and wait for the voices to stop.” I didn’t see that coming, and I loved it. I really wanted the story to continue. So intriguing. Well done!
LikeLike
@Making_Fiction
160 words
Construction
Spat from the heavens. Wherever she worked in her life she felt alone – she felt different.
Today would be the worst day.
Under an incendiary morning sky, the skeletal frameworks of scaffolding impaled the horizon.
She knew they’d be up there. In the heavens, they’d be judging her. A construction site is no place for someone like her.
She was still convalescing, but need outweighed pain.
With every tentative step, she visualised the seeping, felt the rawness of fresh scars, the future sting of antiseptic, the lines of scalpel that created her.
Sure enough, they walked the suspended boards of cement-flecked timber from where the builders hung over the edge of the steel bones like handsome angels with hate in their heart.
They called her unimaginable names. They bared their skin.
She walked tall. She walked to her office where until recently she was still incomplete, still man.
For today was the best day. Today, at last, she was herself.
LikeLike
“Spat from the heavens.” Stinging description. I think you capture this struggle beautifully.
LikeLike
Thank you. You’re doing an amazing job with your writing and brilliant support for others – I just wanted to acknowledge that while I had the chance.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Awww thank you, that’s so sweet. 🙂
For a long time I felt that other writer were strictly the competition, not to be admired unless they had already made it big but thankfully, some kinder writers have shown me how rewarding it can be to rejoice with others’ work. It help that everyone here is so dang good too. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
This line gave me shivers: “…the skeletal frameworks of scaffolding impaled the horizon.” How do you DO that? So many layers here, so well done. Lovely.
LikeLike
Really nice. It’s not easy to get that much story into that little space, and you made me care about this person’s struggle.
LikeLike
Nice to be back in the game; nicer to read a Mark. A King story. 🙂
LikeLike
Thanks Josh. I’m going to try and read as many as possible this week. Next week I have no option 🙂
LikeLike
This is truly a poignant slice of the life for someone on the other side of transition, and in particular the social changes that come with being female. Vivid, haunting, and beautiful.
LikeLike
Dearest Casey – thank you so much. That’s such a heartwarming and lovely comment. Greatly appreciate it.
LikeLike
Beautiful writing, felt like it should be part of something bigger.. so… um… I’m waiting… 😉 Loved it 🙂
LikeLike
How did you do this? I love how you incorporated the angel prompt into the male dominated world of a building site – ‘she knew they’d be up there’ and ‘over the edge…like handsome angels’. The paragraph about the surgical scars is amazing too. The emotional pain screams through the whole of the piece. Accomplished writing. Well done.
LikeLike
Ooh great twist. I was picturing the traditional female in a man’s world but this was unexpected.
LikeLike
“Spat from the heavens,” “incendiary morning sky.” So much vivid description. So much pain, but such an uplifting final line. This is really touching.
LikeLike
bex_spence
155 words
Exhibition:
‘They’re here again’ Michael whispered in his smooth choral voice.
‘Who?’
‘The children’
Joan stared out of her canvas prison into the world beyond. Hundreds of eyes stared back at her, watching, judging. At least once a week the children came and stared. She wished they would go away, leave her alone, leave her to rest.
The children, a jury of their own making, pointing wildly, screeching carelessly, disinterested in her cause, passionate about the pain. A tear rolled down her face.
‘Can’t you make them leave?’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Yes, just don’t hurt them this time?’
Michael slowly nodded. The smile faded on his face.
He reached to embrace her, the corner of the canvas curled, as the flames licked through the paint.
‘Time to say goodbye’
Joan looked into Michael’s eyes as the flames consumed her, consumed them.
‘Thank you. ‘
Flames filled the gilded frame. She was gone, set free at last.
LikeLike
“disinterested in her cause, passionate about the pain” Very true. How often do we flock to scene for the pain rather than the cause. Brilliant take.
LikeLike
I love this concept. “Joan stared out of her canvas prison…” What a great set-up. I love the simple dialogue between her and Michael; so heart-felt. A beautiful final line. Well done.
LikeLike
Very vivid, would like to read more
LikeLike
Oh, I really liked the very different take here – it pulled me in and you kept me hooked through the end. A refreshingly unique perspective.
LikeLike
I really enjoyed how he set her freed her. The choice of fire was perfect.
LikeLike
I love Joan staring out from a canvas prison. This is a very unique take on the prompt. Nice work.
LikeLike
Thanks for the comments. Concept came to me on second viewing of prompt, had nothing the first time!
LikeLike
Original take on the picture, looking out instead of in. Bittersweet ending.
LikeLike
I enjoyed your take on the prompt. “disinterested in her cause, passionate about the pain” This really grabbed me, because people seem to be like this so often. A bittersweet story. Nicely done.
LikeLiked by 1 person
@Making_Fiction
160 words
Angel of Death
She walks wards of clinical hinterland and navigates paths of life and death.
Her uniform is always clean, crisp and blindingly white. She looks like the model professional and her smile is that of cherubim.
She gleams brightly at the visitors.
But they infest the hospital. They are like parasites around their sick. They only care for themselves.
Inheritance due, perhaps? The pretence of care driven by the soothing of their personal guilt?
She knows they’d rather be at home watching the game, swigging the poison of alcohol or wallowing in debauchery.
She knows not if the people she puts to sleep are going to heaven or hell. She doesn’t care. She cannot see angels or demons hovering over the beds of the sick in their land of eternal greyness and hope devoid.
At her side, the needles and cotton-wool. She is doing them a favour and releasing hospital resources for those that might benefit. She is an angel.
Sleep.
LikeLike
Such a haunting piece and so well written. A dark take on the current NHS crisis.
LikeLiked by 1 person
“She cannot see angels or demons hovering over the beds of the sick in their land of eternal greyness and hope devoid.” Love this line and the whole piece! Death is one of the most effective scalpels for laying bare the selfish self.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love the portrayal of the angel of death in a uniform that is “clean, crisp and blindingly white. She looks like the model professional and her smile is that of cherubim.” What a twist from the normal black robe, cowl, and scalpel, and it sets a brilliant overtone for the entire rest of the piece. This is gorgeous. Great job. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Another one!? Man you always floor me.
LikeLiked by 1 person
And you me. Nice to see you back, Josh.
LikeLike
I love that I do want to see her as an angel in this portrayal, to embrace her mercy through your words, even while the grey area of this kind of assistance lingers.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Casey. She’s no angel to me. She’s just trying to justify her actions. Villians normally believe they are doing the right thing. It was strange and very uncomfortable stepping into her shoes.
LikeLike
One word: Yike.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love this, also, curse you for using “clinical hinterland”, what a great phrase – what a haunting story
LikeLiked by 1 person
Chilling. The dispassionate narration works scarily well. Eek.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Woah! Stunning and shocking work. Love this variation on the “angel” theme. Very nice piece.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Another amazing piece. Chilling. ‘clinical hinterland’ – wow!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very chilling. Brilliant first line.
LikeLiked by 1 person
An angel of death who sees herself as an angel of mercy. Dark and chilling, with vivid imagery. Another great story.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haunting indeed. Nice work, Mark.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Foul Justice
Rain fell, like the heavens weeping for one of their own. Where drops hit the pyre they hissed, vocalizing opprobrium for this act of barbarity. Flames licked hungrily upwards, imploring the sky to accept the smoke that poured upwards with the screams of the innocent.
Finally it ended. The crowd moved off, shrouded in guilt that weighed heavier than their rain-sodden cloaks.
In darkness the still smoldering pyre shifted. A skeletal hand pushed up, shifting ash and charred wooden faggots. The naked skull lifted, twisting this way and that as it scanned the courtyard with eyeless sight.
Extricating itself from the remaining chains it stalked towards the gate. The guard never expected to be attacked from behind, by a skeleton. With his life he also surrendered his sword, and a cape.
Armed and cloaked the undead warrior set out; the memory of a heart burning with desire for vengeance.
150 words
@clivetern
LikeLike
Such a delightfully morbid take!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Shivers! How exquisitely creepy! Particularly loved this line: “The crowd moved off, shrouded in guilt that weighed heavier than their rain-sodden cloaks.” Great job!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love the start of this, so creepy
LikeLiked by 1 person
Monstrously creepy! Good visuals.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Excellent undying vengeance. I can feel the unstoppable purpose.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Totally creepy and a very unique take on the prompt. Nice work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Scanning the courtyard with eyeless sight – fantastic.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great horror story.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oooh, I love a horror story. Interesting take on the prompt. “The naked skull lifted, twisting this way and that as it scanned the courtyard with eyeless sight.” So vivid, and so creepy! Nicely done.
LikeLiked by 1 person
FORBIDDEN
Brian S Creek
151 words
@BrianSCreek
#FlashDog
I have been watching her for a while now ever since her beautiful voice drew me down from my seat in heaven.
My cloud floats down, closer and closer. I see how soft and delicate her skin is. My chest begins to tingle. I want to reach out and touch her.
But there are rules. Ever since the Immaculate Conception we angels have been forbidden from associating with humans. It is too dangerous.
Yet the closer I get to her the more the yearning washes over me. I want to take her in my arms and become one. I want to breathe her in.
Still singing, she starts playing with her hair. I lean forward to smell her fragrance. I reach out my arm, my hand, my finger. So close.
Someone is watching me. My master.
I spread my wings and take flight. The urges leaves me as I leave her.
LikeLike
Temptation of angels – great interpretation of the prompt!
LikeLike
“Ever since the Immaculate Conception we angels have been forbidden from associating with humans.” And such a world-splitting event that was. 🙂
LikeLike
Oh so even angels can fall in love…great piece 🙂
LikeLike
I love the idea of this – an angel’s love for a human. You do a great job of portraying his feelings with some well-turned phrases. Nicely done!
LikeLike
Aw man, I feel really bad for this angel.
LikeLike
I think DB Foy has nailed this for me. I thought that part was brilliant. Well done, BC.
LikeLike
Oh, Brian – love the detached beauty of this – keeping romance slighty alien – nice work
LikeLike
Interesting take on the prompt. Nice work.
LikeLike
Such delicate writing.
LikeLike
“Ever since the Immaculate Conception we angels have been forbidden from associating with humans.” Love this line. I can feel this poor angel’s yearning. Great take on the prompt, and beautifully written.
LikeLike
Thank you for such nice comments, guys. Much appreciated.
At the end of the day it’s all your great writing that makes me want to be better.
LikeLike
“The Saving Breath”
by Michael Seese
145 words
Gas hissed from the valve under the unmistakable sign: FLAMMABLE. Sydney struck another match, only to watch it go out.
“Damn it! Why won’t any of you light?”
Alone, more alone than ever, she tried again. And again. Luck still would not even blow a kiss her way.
She fell back, crying. So much had gone wrong lately, beginning with that night. She had ignored her parents and the weather alert, and decided to drive to Cameron’s. She always drove carefully, more so in the snow. She remembered missing the curve just in front of his house… The pond… Her car sinking… Gasping for air… Cameron’s arms around her… His heroic push…
Then watching him slip beneath the ice.
“I miss you, Cameron. I miss you so much.”
“I miss you too, Syd. But it’s not your time,” he whispered, blowing out yet another match.
LikeLike
Such passion and sadness… Teared up a little, Michael. Really great writing here.
LikeLike
“Luck still would not even blow a kiss her way.” This needs to be a saying. Gorgeous take!
LikeLike
The whole story gripped me from the beginning with the intensity of feeling and tight writing. The last line took it from great to awesome. So good. Loved it.
LikeLike
What a great combination of story and action. Bravo.
LikeLike
Love the way you’ve used speech in this, makes it feel real
LikeLike
A well crafted sad and gentle tale. Well done.
LikeLike
Wow, amazing ending. I liked this piece very much.
LikeLike
Thank you to all for your kind comments.
LikeLike
Heartbreaking. He saved her more than once, a true Guardian Angel.
LikeLike
A beautiful, sad story, and well crafted. Perfect, poignant ending. Well done.
LikeLike
This is such a well written and beautiful story. Works perfectly.
LikeLike
Descent
The angel sculpted a woman, and she was perfect. Each curve just right, each line true, not a strand of hair out of place, not a smudge or blemish upon her skin, no cracks or sags, all balanced and correct. Eyes the blue of the blessed sky. He named her Joan.
He visited her, fifteen years after the wombprint. It was all gone. The hair dank like straw, fingers scarred, bulges of overflesh across her hips, her breasts, her legs. The Earth and its incessant drag, its poisoned waters, had ruined her. It ruined them all.
He screamed, thrashed at the skies with his wings, struck his sword through the shadows of her mind. The Earth failed its last chance. She would never amount to anything, none of them would. He ascended, drained, the blue-green globe at his back.
Joan slept off her headache. She woke the next day to the warmth of the sun.
156 words
@DHartleyWriter
LikeLike
“fifteen years after the wombprint” Can we make wombprint a word, please? 🙂
LikeLike
Oooh, I love this. Your description is delicious; I got completely wrapped up in it. The angst of the Creator as he watched his creation destroy herself; so powerful. Awesome job!
LikeLike
Great last line,sir
LikeLike
I like the contrast between the greater idea of perfection and the ruination of all on Earth with the sheer everyday tone of your last line – Joan so completely unaware of her failure, just another day. (Although you could read this as generally God gives mankind a headache but if he leaves us alone we’re fine 🙂 )
LikeLike
Love it. The imagery here is fantastic, and the angel’s angst comes through so strongly. I think my favorite bit is that last line, illustrating Joan’s simple, human experience of beauty in contrast to the angel’s struggle for perfection.
LikeLike
Thanks everyone for your kind comments. For me, Joan is the hero, but not through any God-given blessing, just from being her own perfectly flawed human being in a perfectly flawed world. Also: isnt fantasy such a great genre when you can throw in a word like wombprint and get away with it? haha
LikeLike
A Lesson from History
We called her Bad off because she smelled of charity and her pillar-box tank top was held at knifepoint by her shoulders.
Prescribed seating and out-of-touch teaching made her my history partner. We held hands under the table while dates and places shunned us and found shelter in keener ears. Back in dark corridors I called her Bad off because I wanted no one to know. I thought she wore plate against the names, till teacher spoke of the fire: all taken. She left a note in my locker: when you call me those names you make me do bad things.
I walked around all day with the note in my pocket. I took it out in history class and read it again. The writing was neat and measured but the paper smelled of cigarettes and chip-grease. I screwed it up and left it on the empty seat beside me.
150 words
@MicroBookends
LikeLike
OH so terrible. 😦
“Prescribed seating and out-of-touch teaching made her my history partner” this line jumped out at me. Well done.
LikeLike
I liked that sentence too!
LikeLiked by 1 person
A testament to the power of words. SO good, SO sad. Your command of imagery is truly amazing. The first line stood out: “…and her pillar-box tank top was held at knifepoint by her shoulders.” Wow. Great job!
LikeLike
Love this David, just want to know what was in the final note – although it’s good not to know, so, dont’ tell me, I enjoy the mystery…
LikeLike
What an emotional pendulum all in so few words. Well crafted. I love the phrase: while dates and places shunned us and found shelter in keener ears.
LikeLike
This is excellent character work. I also liked “Prescribed seating and out-of-touch teaching made her my history partner”, but liked so many other lines that I’d be copy/pasting pretty near the whole piece if I tried to quote them all. Very nice piece.
LikeLike
Your writing is always so good, David. There is so much of this story I love. I paricularly love ‘dates and places shunned us’ but I could pick something from every line.
LikeLike
So sad, the cruelty of others. Love the first line.
LikeLike
As always David, there’s some great description here. Loved “her pillar-box tank top was held at knifepoint by her shoulders”.
Well written and quite sad story.
LikeLike
Heavenly words
Ian Martyn (@IBMartyn)
154 words
‘Susan, Susan, do you not hear the fanfare pronouncing my love for you?’
‘Oh you, you’re all fanfares and beating wings. My mother warned me about angels like you. You only come down to earth for a bit of hanky-panky. Then it’s off back to heaven and I’ll never see you again.
‘Oh Susan, you wound me deeply. See my feathers moult at the harshness of you words. My clouds turn to rain. If I cannot melt your heart then I shall pierce mine with this sword.’
‘And I’ve heard that one before, the old stabbing through the heart trick. You’re immortal. No, you get a girl to go all faint and sympathetic, then its wham bam thank you mam, a brief moment of ethereal ecstasy and I’m left holding the baby, literally.’
‘Susan, Susan, my love. Is there nothing that will convince you?’
‘Well a nice pair of stout shoes wouldn’t go amiss.’
LikeLike
Love the voices here, Ian! They draw strong figures out of my head. 🙂
” a brief moment of ethereal ecstasy and I’m left holding the baby” Also, me encanta esta!
LikeLike
Lol! This is great; the contrast between the two voices is striking comedy. That final line had me rolling. Lovely.
LikeLike
I couldn’t resist
LikeLike
Or a couple of pints of stout would probably be ok 😉
LikeLike
Bwahahaha!
LikeLike
Now, that’s one smart lady. lol! Very cute romp of a piece. I very much enjoyed reading this.
LikeLike
Oh funny. Love Susan’s down-to-earth tone and practical nature contrasts so well with the angel’s flummery.
LikeLike
Lol! I love it. This is fantastic. Susan cracks me up. “A nice pair of stout shoes” Too funny!
LikeLike
Guardianship
Michael Simko (@michaelsimko1)
160 Words
My lady coils at his appearance, and averts her gaze.
I reach my index finger to the third vertebrae below her neck. Summoning my power, I invoke cold.
My lady shudders and looks back at Earl. On either side of her face I create warmth. Her body responds with a blush. I summon the scent of rosemary in front of her nose, and on her hair, so this sensation may linger.
Earl isn’t her type, or anyone’s type. He’s pale, awkward, and has bad posture. He’s the one for my lady to love.
It’s been a month since I started creating physical sensations when my lady sees him. My powers only work by adjusting the factors that humans interpret as love.
She approaches Earl and takes his hand.
I feel a little pity for my lady. But, as a true believer Earl has me, his own guardian angel. My lady should be more pious, so an angel would protect her.
LikeLike
“My lady should be more pious, so an angel would protect her” How absolutely terrifying.
LikeLike
And here I was going for sweet. Thanks! (so fun to read comments at lunch before running off)
LikeLiked by 1 person
What an interesting concept; I really enjoyed this! Particularly liked the twist at the end: “My lady should be more pious, so an angel would protect her.” Good for Earl; too bad he couldn’t have a lady more worthy. 😉
LikeLike
Now now, Earl would just be happy for whom the Angels send him. Thanks!
LikeLike
Go, Earl, go! Glad he has a good wing man.
(See what I did, there?)
LikeLike
hahaha. Brilliant!
LikeLike
Quite creepy this manipulation of the angel’s even though I don’t like the sound of the woman.
LikeLike
Aww, this was sweet right up until “I feel a little pity for my lady. But, as a true believer Earl has me, his own guardian angel. My lady should be more pious, so an angel would protect her.” That line is chilling, and makes me rethink the rest of the story. I love “I summon the scent of roseary in front of her nose, and on her hair, so this sensation may linger.” Well done!
LikeLike
Gone
I can’t do this any more. I just can’t.
You can. You are strong, the strongest girl I ever met, remember?
It’s too hard.
I’m here though. Right with you. Like I said I would be.
——————–
I unpeel my ear and cheek from the door, because they got kinda stuck to it when I was listening in.
“Who you talking to mommy?”
I look in the wardrobe, then under bed.
“No-one, Anna.” She’s crying. Again. “Mommy was just talking to herself.”
I check behind the curtains too. Just in case.
“C’mon sweetpea, let’s get you to school.”
I take mommy’s hand and wish really hard for a smile to go through my fingertips to hers.
——————-
He watches his girls leave the room. He sees Anna glance back, over her shoulder, and shake her head. Then, they are gone.
——————-
As the bright morning sunshine slices in through the window, an angel weeps.
152 words
@lilwhitefeathrs (formerly @dragonsflypoppy)
LikeLike
Nicely done! Makes me want to know more about this burdensome task.
LikeLike
Thanks Foy!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love the three viewpoints woven in so seamlessly here; well, four, I suppose, if you make the last line a separate viewpoint. Such a touching story. Nicely done!
LikeLike
Thank you! I’m not sure whether the last POV is separate either – is that bad if you are the one penning the tale?!? Lovely to get your feedback Tamara.
LikeLike
I hope it’s not bad; most of the time, I have no idea what I’m doing when I’m writing, so . . . let’s hope it’s not that big a deal. 😉
LikeLike
Favorite line – “I take mommy’s hand and wish really hard for a smile to go through my fingertips to hers.” I love this because this is how I remember feeling as a child when my Mom seemed upset.
LikeLike
This is so tender. I too love the line ‘I…wish really hard for a smile…’ Beautiful and powerful.
LikeLike
Tissue time – ‘he watches his girls leave the room’.
LikeLike
“I take mommy’s hand and wish really hard for a smile to go through my fingertips to hers.” So heartbreaking! A sad, moving story of loss. Nicely done.
LikeLike
Lovely Dragonliness please can you make lines 2 and 4 italic? Thank you *throws copious amounts of chocolate at your feet* 🙂
LikeLike
I hope those chocolates are carefully and sanitarily wrapped.
LikeLike
But of course – only the best!
LikeLike
Attempt #1914JM
“They know you don’t belong here,” warns the whisper in my ear.
“I’m doing my best,” I say out loud, clenching my sweating hands.
Faces from paintings turn to look at me.
I can smell smoke in the distance. I sense a moment on the precipice.
“It has been advised that you return to us,” the whisper repeats for the third time today.
“Not yet!”
More faces turn to look, words whispered behind hands.
“Please return to the point of origin. You are going to be killed.”
I want to claw the implant out of my head, cease these words cutting through a thousand years to pierce my thoughts and my resolve.
I can do it. I can witness history, understand first hand the waves and currents that shaped the world I know.
“No. I am not afraid…I was born to do this.”
And I keep walking through the crowd.
151 words
@CaseyCaseRose
LikeLike
“I want to claw the implant out of my head” *shivers!*
LikeLike
“I can smell smoke in the distance. I sense a moment on the precipice.” Stunning. Great story!
LikeLike
Wow, what an original take! I love the time-travel idea, and the resolve to live the life she was born to live, despite impending death. Gorgeously written.
LikeLike
In a tiny word count you’ve hinted at an entire universe-spanning novel and one I’d love to read. This is just my sort of thing. Well done, Casey.
LikeLike
I would like to read more of this… both a prequel and through to the conclusion! Intriguing piece.
LikeLike
‘Faces from paintings turn to look at me’ and ‘cease the words cutting through a thousand years’. I love how you have quite effortlessly introduced the idea of time travel. I would like to read more of this world.
LikeLike
Turning your back on the safe path and walking into the unknown takes a lot of courage particularly for a stranger (alien) whether from a far land or other world. Nice story.
LikeLike
Joan sat on the rocks, watching the men who followed her prepare for another battle. By God’s will they would convert the unbelievers, or remove them from God’s Earth. This was her destiny, as spoken to her by the Archangel Michael.
Pride’s eyes gleamed. Joan was such a treasure. The way she believed his disguise, the words he whispered in her ear, the tasks he asked her to perform. “Your way is the only way, the way of God the Father,” he whispered the words once more. “Our Father in heaven, may your will be done.”
Joan’s eyes glazed as she thought, “God picked me to lead this fight.” Her right hand formed a fist before her chest. “I shall rid the world of unbelievers.” Her gaze swept over her followers, “No matter the cost.”
Pride laughed mightily, knowing the body count would rise so long as Joan survived, and performed the so-called will of God.
157 Words
@LurchMunster
LikeLike
Pride is quite the tricky devil. We think we’ve shed him and he’s got another skin.
LikeLike
I love the personification you lend to Pride in this one. The back-and-forth between his characters and Joan’s is quite well done. Great job!
LikeLike
I like the idea of pride being disguised as Michael the Archangle. I like the message here that pride is a slippery devil.
LikeLike
Nice take. How many other deaths have been caused by pride?
LikeLike
Title: Contemplation
Words:160
@RTayaket
There are both angels and devils among us. They whisper in our ears and light fires in our souls. At every choice, dilemma, and decision the opinions of these other beings weigh in on the human mind. But humans are not puppets – they still choose a course of action. The ultimate choice to follow the persuasion of angels or devils depends on the individual. Some individuals are inclined to be more influenced by angels; others, by devils. These people live their lives with clear instructions in their ears and burning passion in their souls.
Then there are people divided down the middle. People like me are not swayed one way or another, but rationalize the options. We stare off not at the world, but through the world, in limbo of contemplation. The curse of hearing both the angels and devils and agreeing or disagreeing with both sides equally leads to a life of inaction. So we sit. And we stare.
LikeLike
“So we sit. And we stare.” Goodness, this gets me- well done! Inaction could be seen as a choice.
LikeLike
Thank you for your comment! Absolutely agree – inaction itself is an action.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Powerful ending, probably because I realize how guilty I am of inaction. Wow. This is quite a deep piece with a lot of truth to it.
LikeLike
Thank you, Tamara! I realize I get so caught up worrying about the consequences or the “what-ifs” that I end up in this situation.
LikeLike
Rasha, I adored the beginning. So powerful and magnetic it pulled me in straight away. Nicely done.
LikeLike
Thank you, Mark! Really appreciate it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, frozen in place. Very nice last line.
LikeLike
Better to do something than nothing at all. Thoughtful piece on the angels and devils that sit on our shoulders. I like the way that this links in to the painting with the line ‘So we sit. And we stare.’
LikeLike
“Limbo of contemplation ” Yum. Loved this story. Nicely done.
LikeLike
Title: Battle Ready
Word Count: 158
Twitter: @serotoninjunkie
“Don’t look back.”
She holds the tattered broom in her hand and focuses her wide eyes on the open field ahead.
The trumpet blares, sound erupting like lava spewing from an angry volcano. Still, her eyes stay focused away.
The angel’s presence, once calming, fans the flames of her fear. Though she doesn’t turn, the cacophony of battle reaches her ears. It has begun.
She stands, the broom falling to the ground as her decision is made. The sound of its wooden handle hitting the rock below lost to the sounds of metal crashing into bone behind her.
Fluidly, she reaches up and takes the shining sword from the angel’s hand. Its heavy weight and deadly cold steel feels comforting to her clammy hands.
She slashes the air once. Twice. The blade shimmers in the red dawn light. She turns, battle-ready and unafraid.
She steps forward, closer to the fray.
“Don’t look back.”
She knows she never will.
LikeLike
Nice! I like the peek into that moment of decision.
LikeLike
Thanks!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love the contrast between the broom and the sword, the hesitation, and the decision. The twice-repeated “Don’t look back” gives the phrase all the more weight. Nicely done.
LikeLike
Thank you. 🙂
LikeLike
I like that the angel was once a calming force, but is no longer what she is relying on – it is all self-determination from this moment forward. Nice work.
LikeLike
Nice description of the moment of decision. You’ve created a very sense of ‘separateness’ here between Joan and the battle before she takes the sword and joins the fight.
LikeLike
Angel of War
@hollygeely
159 words
“Are you sure about this?” Jason had worn a toga exactly once before and that night was why he no longer spoke to Jack Daniels.
“Of course it is,” Isabel said. She picked up her broom and tested its weight, as though it was a mighty spear.
“I’m not a good actor,” Jason said.
“You don’t have to act, just sing. You’ve got the voice of an – ”
“No.”
“ – angel.” She grinned and passed him the plastic halo. “Besides, Judy bailed at the last minute and you’re my only option.”
“That’s flattering.”
“Jason. In a moment, you’ll be airborne, bestowing upon the maiden tidings of battle and glory.”
“I’m pretty sure I’ll still be the idiot in the toga.”
“Don’t worry. You’ve got great knees.”
Isabel smiled the smile that had got Jason to agree all this. There was no point in trying to resist; he took up the prop sword and became the angel of war.
LikeLike
“Jason had worn a toga exactly once before and that night was why he no longer spoke to Jack Daniels.” teehee, so much fun this piece 🙂
LikeLike
🙂 Thanks!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love the light tone of this, and the feel of the camaraderie between Jason and Isabel. “Don’t worry. You’ve got great knees.” A new pick-up line? 😉 Nicely done.
LikeLike
Thank you! 😀
LikeLike
This is really good character work. I really believe the relationship, here. Nice work.
LikeLike
Thanks!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Funny. I liked the line ‘Jason had worn a toga exactly once before and that night was why he no longer spoke to Jack Daniels.’
LikeLike
Thank you!
LikeLike
BAIT
Brian S Creek
150 words
@BrianSCreek
#FlashDog
I have never hidden from my wife what it is that I do. The day that I enlightened her I expected that she would be repulsed and flee. To my surprise she understood.
From then on, understanding was all I ever asked from her. She never judged my methods or my goal. She never asked me to step from my path. On the contrary she surprised me further.
She sits now as bait, in the centre of the clearing. As instructed her mind bellows forth thoughts to lure my prey.
As the Angel approaches my wife, my one true love continues to remain still. She cannot reveal her true intentions or risk the creature’s fury.
The sight of my Damned Rifle stares at the creature’s chest. I wonder how many more Angles I must exterminate before He intervenes.
He will grant me an audience. He will answer for his crimes.
LikeLike
“He will grant me an audience. He will answer for his crimes.” Wow, stunning look at the lengths mortals may go for an audience with the Immortal.
LikeLike
Wow, this does a great job of detailing the character’s inner angst. Like Deb said, it creates an interesting picture of the meeting place between the physical and beyond. I like your take on this.
LikeLike
A nice creative twist. I enjoyed this.
LikeLike
Oh wow I did NOT expect that ending!! Excellent twist.
LikeLike
Demanding to be heard in such a grim way. Dark story. I like your reference to his ‘Damned Rifle’.
LikeLike
Such a creative and engaging story. Nice.
LikeLike
Elisa @AverageAdvocate
Word Count: 157
___________________
On Her Own Two Feet
___________________
The stone might be dusting her toes, but Joan can stand on her own through a little dirt.
What I’m concerned about it whether she war away the sticks and stones. Can she fight off heartbreak? A friend’s betrayal? Cruel laughter or an enemy disguised as her boyfriend?
She was always a tender reed, an unlit wick in my arms. I’d wonder how one so thirsty–needy–could be one so strong. She used to giggle adorably when I’d use our lamb skin to hide my face. Even then, with a chubby grasp on the leather, she wasn’t scared when her protector was out of sight.
Pigtails and arrows, swimming holes and swords; braver than I, but I’d hold her to comfort while enveloped in the dark.
Despite the plague, despite the wars, she was her own but she was everyone’s–especially mine.
Then one day, my fragile girl flew away.
Joan handle the world, I’m just not sure I can.
LikeLike
Awww this is sweet. 🙂
LikeLike
Sweet and sad. “Despite the plague, despite the wars, she was her own but she was everyone’s–especially mine.” I love the tenderness that throbs through this whole thing. Nicely done.
LikeLike
“Pigtails and arrows, swimming holes and swords; braver than I, but I’d hold her to comfort while enveloped in the dark.” Excellent descriptive sentence that seems to summarize an entire girlhood in just a few words.
LikeLike
‘War away the sticks and stones’ – great phrase.
LikeLike
Predetermined
@TheShakes72
154 words
Wings aflame, they come with some new proclamation.
They’ve given up with whispering and subtlety, there’s nothing mysterious about their ways.
All the noise and fury of heaven is at their command and directed at me.
I do not listen.
I will not listen.
I cannot listen.
It’s all about choice, about free will but their message is relentless. How many times must one dismiss the creator before being left alone?
I’d speak with Mary but she never comes. She’d understand what it means to hold a life in your belly, to forge it in the furnace of your heart. She’d know what it means to love the child and not the man he will become, to only love the child.
I catch their words on the wind:
“…and he shall be known as the Prince of Pestilence, the juvenile pariah of nations.”
I do not listen.
He’ll have me.
He’ll have his father.
LikeLike
Reread this straight through after finishing.
Love this line particularly.
““…and he shall be known as the Prince of Pestilence, the juvenile pariah of nations.””
LikeLike
*Jaw on floor* Perfect and beautiful, David. Words that are liquid gold. Simply gorgeous. I. love. this.
LikeLike
Yes! Brilliant story. “I’d speak with Mary but she never comes” Great writing.
LikeLike
Will you stop writing beautifully sad stories, please? (By which I mean, please write some more, but let me get some tissues first 😉 )
LikeLike
‘to love the child and not the man he will become, to only love the child’ took my breath away. Amazing.
LikeLike
The mother loves her child regardless of the knowledge of what is to come. Darkness and love at the same time in this story. Great take.
LikeLike
Amazing work, David. Loved the abrupt sentences mixed in to make the story a bit more personal.
LikeLike
Josh Bertetta
“A Walk at Night”
151 Words
@JBertetta
“Stinks.”
“Yup.”
“Nasty.”
“Here.”
“Thanks.”
“Look.”
“Where?”
“There.”
“Where?”
“There!”
“Oh.”
“Shit.”
“Um…”
“Shit.”
“Um…”
“Let’s—“
“No.”
“What?”
“Wait.”
“Wait!?”
“Come—”
“Wait.”
“Now.”
“Not—“
“Ow!”
“What?”
“Ow!”
“What!?”
“Joan?”
…
“Joan?”
…
“Where–”
“Sorry.”
“Whew.”
“Sorry.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah.”
“Sure?”
“Sure.”
“Whattha?”
“What?”
“Thought.”
“Thought?”
“Nevermind.”
“Flashlight?”
“Broken.”
“Damn.”
“Still—“
“Stinks.” `
“Worse.”
“Stronger.”
“Yup.”
“Shh.”
“What?”
“Listen.”
…
“Pierre?”
…
“Pierre?”
“Listening.”
“You—?”
“Yup.”
“Well?”
“Nothing.”
“I’m—”
“Scared.”
“You?”
“Yeah.”
“Cold.”
“Colder.”
“Lots.”
“Freezing.”
“Here.”
“Thanks.”
“Better?”
“Yeah.”
“Good.”
“Pierre?”
“What?”
“Can—?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Curious.”
“Curious?”
“Aren’t—?”
“No?”
“Little?”
“No.”
“Scared?”
“Yeah.”
“Still?”
“Yeah.”
…
…
…
“Darker.”
“Way.”
“Clouds.”
“Yup.”
“Now?”
“Wait.”
“How—?”
“Shh.”
“What?”
“Shh.”
“Why?”
“Look.”
“Where?”
“There.”
“Ohmigosh.”
“Alien?”
“Nah.”
“Chupacabra?”
“Chupacabra?”
“Well?”
“How—?”
“Demon.”
“Demon?”
“Demon.”
“Let’s—”
“Quiet.”
“Now?”
“Shit.”
“Shit.”
“Fuck.”
“It’s…”
“Looking…”
“Straight.”
“At…”
“Us…”
“Uh-oh.”
“Run.”
“Joan!”
“Run!”
“Joan!”
“Run!”
“Joan!”
LikeLike
Got a good laugh out of this one. 🙂 Favorite word: Chupacabra. Not just once, but twice, no less. 🙂 Quite impressive that you’ve made a story of sorts with only one word per sentence. 🙂 Nicely done.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Tamara. Been wanting to try this for some time, but kept on forgetting. Sure was fun. Difficult, but fun.
LikeLike
Haha! I like that Chupacabra made an appearance. Was not expecting him for this prompt. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I wasn’t expecting it to come into either, but there it was… 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Josh, I too loved ‘Chupacabra’, but there was so much more to this, for me. It’s incredibly hard to get something totally unique and you’ve done this. It works really well too. I’m sure you’ll be in the running – but where will you come. We’ll have to wait and see.
LikeLike
I sense elements from the absurdists here! Loved your constraint and the way you made the most out of it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is good! Love the concept. Executed so well.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Marie 🙂
LikeLike
Fantastic. Such a clear picture built up in my head from just one word in each line.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I really appreciate that Steph. It was a stretch of an attempt, but I was pleased with the final product
LikeLike
Radical! I love it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Michael, that means a lot. 🙂
LikeLike
Great way of doing this, made me laugh 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
A Devil in the Head
@EmilyJuneStreet
159 words
Agatha ignored the sensation of beetles crawling up her neck, the urge to yawn, the hammering behind her eyes.
The witch-hunter, hired by her aunt, brandished his bodkin. “Shed your earthly garments!”
Agatha disrobed, terrified.
He stabbed her chest, belly, thighs, never penetrating the migraine’s throb.
Why did her own family trust this stranger’s word above hers?
“Witch!” Spittle flew into Agatha’s face. “See her teat that does not bleed!” The hunter pointed at a mole.
Her aunt gasped. Agatha knew he’d flipped his bodkin surreptitiously, pressing only the blunt end there so she would not bleed.
Rage overwhelmed pain. Her migraine exploded; she called her familiars.
An angel removed the witch-hunter’s head with one swoop of a fell sword. A knight blared a weirding trumpet, stealing the memories of onlookers.
Agatha dressed as her guardians and the witch-hunter faded away.
“You had the headache—” her aunt said blearily.
“It’s gone,” Agatha replied. “No need for the doctor.”
LikeLike
Wow, what a gripping story with such vivid description and so much emotion. I love the last two lines–a normal, everyday covering for the hell that just broke loose only moments earlier. Great job!
LikeLike
Goodness this is intense! Well done 🙂
LikeLike
Awesome story! I love how vivid and intense it is, and the ending, like nothing happened. Well-done!
LikeLike
Great contrast between the drama of the story and the last two everyday lines.
LikeLike
Love how you wrap the ending up, brilliant
LikeLike
Wireless Echoes
We were birthed from machines. Armed with digital missives and vacant bones, we found one another behind a blinking cursor and gigabytes of ache. No skin. No voice. We yearned and soothed with prose typed from plastic keys.
Faith wasn’t only her name. She believed in soul mates and the fairy tale of true romance. She worshipped at the altar of sonnets and serendipity. Men had derailed those notions repeatedly.
Her poetry spoke of loss. Of fading heartbeats, like a wisp of crimson smoke dissolving in the night air. Her messages, her electrified ink, told stories of fractured encounters.
She lounged on my synthetic lap. I asked for her sorrow and a purging of the loneliness. Her analog heart spilled throbbing blood across my screen. I cleansed it with a sympathetic text.
I was the therapist. She was the savior. Her melancholy ruminations suffocated my own pain. Faith reached through the machine like a replicated angel and healed me.
@Blukris
159 words
#FlashDog
LikeLike
Wow, this floored me! So many layers that wrap so nicely together. I love the idea of a keyboard romance, and then the way you describe it is gorgeous: “…we found one another behind a blinking cursor and gigabytes of ache.” I love how the two characters work toward each other’s completeness. “Faith reached through the machine like a replicated angel and healed me.” Simply beautiful. Well done, Chris!
LikeLike
Wow. Your feedback is slways appreciated. Thank you, Tamara
LikeLike
Simply gorgeous.
LikeLike
Thanks!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Beautiful and true. Love your way with words.
LikeLike
Thank you, Voima!
LikeLike
So much to chew on here. My favorite line = “She lounged on my synthetic lap. I asked for her sorrow and a purging of the loneliness. Her analog heart spilled throbbing blood across my screen. I cleansed it with a sympathetic text.”
LikeLike
Thank you for commenting!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow- this was so good! Loved all of it.
LikeLike
‘Gigabytes of ache’, ‘analog heart’. Great stuff.
LikeLike
Thank you!
LikeLike
Simply beautifully told, great stuff
LikeLike
Thank you!
LikeLike
“She worshiped at the altar of sonnets and serendipity.” I kept going back to this line.
This is a beautiful tale steeped in melancholy and drunk with hope. Lovely words!
LikeLike
Thank you. It’s always nice to receive feedback from a writer like you, one I greatly admire.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Unwanted Guest
@ceckybonway
158 Words
“Cut! Cut! Cut!,” shouted Escobar for the twelfth time today. “Why can’t you three do what is demanded of you?! Devin, you’re facing the wrong way, AGAIN. And Steven, you’re in the middle of telling Sarah she’s not welcome in heaven. This is not a happy message. Stop whispering. You should be shouting! And your holding your sword like it’s an afterthought. Point it at Sarah. And where the hell is Josephine?”
“Right here, sir,” the costumer director squeaked, mouse-like, from the corner.
“Where are her shoes?”
“Her shoes, sir?”
“Yes. The poor girl’s got no shoes.”
“Well, yes, because we decided she was poor. Poor people don’t have shoes.”
“Bare feet brings on a sense of innocence. Shoes, though… shoes are a gateway to evil. Only with shoes can you effectively run from Justice, kick a man when he’s down, or scuff fancy floors. Get her some shoes!”
“Yes sir!”
“Let’s do it again, from the top!”
LikeLike
I love this! That whole first paragraph sent me back to my high school stage productions; I got a good laugh out of: “And you’re holding your sword like it’s an afterthought.” 🙂 Nicely done.
LikeLike
Thanks! And thanks again for correcting my cardinal sin error of using the wrong you’re. I’m still kicking myself over that one! I know better, but typed it wrong and then caught it after it was too late to correct.
LikeLike
“And where the hell is Josephine?” LOL’ed for real with this one. Great job!
LikeLike
A truly original take on the prompt. I love the director, curious as to why people aren’t responsive to his rantings. LOL ! Thanks for the fun read.
LikeLike
Funny take. I like this, particularly the description of shoes as being a gateway to evil.
LikeLike
Josh Bertetta
The Paradox of Obedience
160 Words
@JBertetta
“What the hell happened to you?”
“Fuck if I know. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it.”
“So what are you going to?”
“Well he gave me freedom to roam, do whatever I please.”
“Well that doesn’t sound too bad.”
“Yeah, I guess.” He sighed.
“Why do you keep whispering?”
“Because he said I can only whisper from now on.”
“Whisper? That sounds kind of weird. So really, what happened?”
“It’s kind of fucked up. I mean there I was obedient as I have always been, worshipping him as only he can be worshipped. Then he goes and creates this dude, names him Adam, and tells all of us to bow down to this, what he called, ‘human.’ I wouldn’t because I only bow down to him. He says I was being disobedient. And there I am thinking he was testing us. Everyone did it but me. I was proud of myself. Then he says, ‘Get out Shaitan!’”
LikeLike
I got a chuckle out of the layered combination of “What the hell happened…” with the end line when I figured out who was talking. Great job. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
So unique! Love it 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Like the street tone to this writing. The poor devil was onto a loser from the start wasn’t he?
LikeLike
Thanks Steph!
LikeLike
Seeing
(153 words)
We assemble the chairs into a circle, when the doc arrives. He tries to wear casual clothes, but they’re unsuited to him.
‘Guys’- his informal, generic address for those who’ve dispensed with rank or whose rank dispensed with them – rolls around his mouth like an oversized gobstopper.
Liam – divorced, allowed only supervised visits with his kids – is always desperate to speak. He’s nervy, rattles like a pill bottle. I can’t look at him for long, his fidgeting fingers make me want to find an itch to scratch.
Steve sits opposite me, splay-legged, muscle-bound. He’s steady. Still. I let my eyes hold on to him for now. But he’ll cry ten minutes in.
The doc thinks I’m not paying attention.
‘Joan?’
‘Yeah.’
‘You taking your meds?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Voices?’
‘No.’
‘Hallucinations?’
‘No,’ I say as I continue to avoid the dead gaze of the boy soldier for whom our circle forms a halo.
LikeLike
Oh, wow. “…as I continue to avoid the dead gaze of the boy soldier for whom our circle forms a halo.” Striking imagery. Great job!
LikeLike
Thanks. That is much appreciated.
LikeLike
“He’s nervy, rattles like a pill bottle” Love this phrase! It ties in well with the suggestion she’s not taking her meds.
LikeLike
Thank you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh wow – powerful ending. I especially liked how you described Steve. Great writing.
LikeLike
Thank you so much.
LikeLike
Marie, there is something magical about your writing that always connects with me. Powerful, unique and thought-provoking. I raise my hat to you on yet another wonderful entry.
LikeLike
Thanks, Mark. That is such a huge compliment and really appreciated.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is an excellent character. I want to read more about her. My fave line = “I can’t look at him for long, his fidgeting fingers make me want to find an itch to scratch.”
LikeLike
Thank you. Very kind.
LikeLiked by 1 person
A short story that deals with such a huge issue so well, and your last line … very powerful.
LikeLike
Thanks, Steph.
LikeLike
The ending gave me chills. Really enjoyed this. Nicely done.
LikeLike
Thanks. Much appreciated.
LikeLike
Foy
@db_foy
word count: 156
#JeSuisJehanne, #JeSuisCharlie
Her pulse is thick.
There, her cross awaits eager to embrace her despite arms broken for kindling at its feet.
His wrist tilts.
It’s time and he sits at the head of the oaken slab, heart pumping coolly.
Knots rub her flesh, tenderizing her for the flame’s feast.
The Fierbois blade would devastate these bonds but its hilt is far from grasp.
Scritch. Scratch.
His pen pulls proposals into the third dimension, an armament as unassuming as they are.
Manic roars cut her ears.
She who violated their masculinity must burn for her rebellious cause.
Normalcy’s thrum shatters in screams.
Free expression -raping the image of the prophet- is the impetus for blood now spilling.
An armored hand lights the pyre.
Faith cannot hold the floodgate and epinephrine surges through her bloodstream.
He’s staring into the dark eye,
Cortisol driving his body into a hyperglycemic state seconds before the firing pin is struck.
Two candles extinguishing.
LikeLike
So sad. Painful to read on top of the news, but a beautiful vent. Lovely, heart-wrenching imagery.
LikeLike
Thank you, Tamara. It took me a while to write because these types of stories hurt and frustrate me. The parallel isn’t perfect but then neither is humanity.
LikeLike
Sometimes the best stories are those that we find hard to write and read. This is a fantastic entry and one you should be very proud of. Good luck.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank, Mark. Same to you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very powerful story. Beautifully done!
LikeLike
Thank you, Voimaoy.
LikeLike
Nice way to handle the prompt and also express your feelings around/about current events. Nice work.
LikeLike
Thank you, J.R.
LikeLike
This is so powerful. I think you have done a great job here.
LikeLike
Thank you, Marie. I appreciate the compliment.
LikeLike
Pain so well expressed for what has happened recently.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. My hope was to honor the fallen.
LikeLike
Potent as hell. “Arms broken for kindling.” Damn.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you.
LikeLike
So very powerful and sad, these two French events tied together so beautifully. The last line is haunting. Well done, Deb.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Margaret. For some reason my mind saw a connection.
LikeLike
Ignoring The Call
Margaret Locke (margaretlocke.com or @Margaret_Locke)
156 words
“Hark, go ye east! There ye shall find a man of the name Bob, and embark upon a dinner date, and later possibly some smooching…”
Joan took in the bizarrely dressed – but admittedly foxy – fellow hanging over her shoulders. He wore a gaudy green sheet with ludicrously large wings attached to it, and held a sword – a sword, for Pete’s sake.
This was the strangest circus she’d ever seen. Dudes cosplaying as trumpet-blowing knights. Angel wannabes suggesting hook-ups. Where were the acrobats? The clowns?
“I haven’t even finished my cotton candy!”
“This is thy last chance. Thy eHarmony membership doth expired yesterday,” whispered the flying Adonis.
“Does he look anything like you?”
“Doth anyone in real life?”
Joan sighed, her shoulders slumping.
“No thanks,” she said. “I don’t wanna miss something important.”
The angel rolled his eyes.
“Like thy soul mate?” he muttered as he flew off. “And women say men never listen.”
LikeLike
Love, love, love this! I was going to pull a phrase out that I liked and then realized I would have to pull out all of them. Anything that makes me laugh is fine by me. 🙂
LikeLike
Hee hee, thanks! I wanted to work in something about her bug-eyed expression, but ran out of words. Still, my first thought was, what the heck did that angel say to her to give her that facial expression?? 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Definitely! I thought similarly. Poor gal looks traumatized
LikeLike
Fabulous! Love it and it made me smile – great result! 🙂
LikeLike
Thanks – glad I could amuse others!
LikeLike
*Where’s Tamara?* *Oh, that’s her over there wheezing on the ground. I think she was trying to control her laugh, but it went south.* *Poor girl.* *She’ll be a mess to clean up in the morning.*
LikeLike
LOL. Goofball.
LikeLike
‘Tis true, I must admit. 😉
LikeLike
I love this! What a fun romp! This sounds like every singles anything that I ever went to, once upon a time! fun, fun.
LikeLike
Hee, thanks so much!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, hilarious! ‘Thy eHarmony membership doth expired yesterday’, love it.
LikeLike
Thanks so much!
LikeLike
Funny! We need some comedy here.
LikeLike
An Awakening (160 words)
@brett_milam
It was as if Sylvia could see the battle hymn coming over the hills like silky fog before she heard it. Maybe it was just in her head, but her blood seemed to dance at the edge of her skin.
The rhythmic cadence from the distant drummer caused her to walk a bit faster, to stand a bit taller and to grip her hand a bit tighter on her axe.
She wasn’t supposed to be here. Nobody knew she was, but the battle hymn had drawn her from the village. Drawn her to the axe.
That battle hymn represented the coming of death; the death of her father and brother, the last time they came around. Death’s arrival ought not sound so beautiful.
Sylvia had only ever used the axe on a stubborn block of wood, but she still remembered how powerful the swing had felt.
Human flesh was not like wood, but naturally it would be just as stubborn.
LikeLike
*Shivers*
“Death’s arrival ought not sound so beautiful.” Lovely. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Remind me not to meet Sylvia in a back alley any time soon. 😉 Love the phrasing: “…her blood seemed to dance at the edge of her skin.” Also, “Death’s arrival ought not sound so beautiful.” Great rising sense of foreboding. Excellent!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow, such kind feedback, thank you!
LikeLike
ew… I am creeped out yet love the Human flesh is not like wood sentence! Ew in a good way! ha! NIce work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha, thank you!
LikeLike
‘The blood seemed to dance at the edge of her skin’ – tingling phrase. The whole pace of your story fits the title perfectly.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!
LikeLike
Vibrant prose throughout. “but the battle hymn had drawn her from the village. Drawn her to the axe.” Yes, please. Well-.done
LikeLiked by 1 person
High praise coming from you, sir, thanks!
LikeLike
Yikes, that last line’s a killer! Great take as usual.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Grace!
LikeLiked by 1 person
The Summoner
A.J. Walker
Horns reverberated through the valleys and the forests with the noise from horses and cannons, swords and bows; Death would be busy here today.
Joan sat on the limestone outcrop overlooking the battles, feverish shivers ran through the young woman in waves as her visions became solid. She’d foretold this day, when what seemed hopeless and lost would be overturned.
The voices told her to be strong, that her words would bring victory to her people and that peace would follow. She would be the summoner. Michael spoke confidently yet conflicted; she must take control. Risks were high, but to do nothing would bring only defeat.
She found her voice and the words from nowhere flowed, words she had never heard and yet knew the meaning. Over and over; a chant.
People knelt beside her afraid of this witchcraft. The chant louder as her voices left her. The noise of war paused as the summoner’s words brought forth the dragon.
160 words
@zevonesque
#FlashDogs
LikeLike
Can feel the cadence of this story, and the cadence of the war. Beautiful language. I love that last line: “The noise of war paused as the summoner’s words brought forth the dragon.”
LikeLike
Nice twist! I love the title of this piece 🙂
LikeLike
This reads like an excerpt from a (well-written) novel; makes me want the beginning and the end, too. NIce work.
LikeLike
Sir William
(158 words)
Sir William stumbled and nearly fell as he sidestepped the battle axe closing in on his head. Seizing the moment when the marauder overreached and was off balance, Sir William ran his opponent through to the crossguard. Pulling his sword from the belly of the marauder, Sir William whirled and met another incoming blow. Using the pommel of his sword, Sir William smashed the marauders face relentlessly.
All around him the world raged as mercy was forgotten,
Steel sang as it bit though armour and into flesh. Men screamed as steel severed limb and life. Compassion and humanity were lost to the violence of the frenzy.
Picking up the bloodied banner Sir Gerrard once held in his now lifeless hand, Sir William urged the knights on. Stepping over the dead, Sir William and the remaining knights purged the village they had sworn to defend of the last marauders.
In deathly silence, Margaret sat and waited for her angel.
LikeLike
Terrifying thought “mercy was forgotten”!
LikeLike
An alternate last line. new word count 160.
“Sitting on the stone wall, Margaret sat and waited for Sir Gerrard.”
LikeLike
AARGH, it must be Friday, sorry it’s been a long week. The last line shoud be:
“Sitting on the stone wall, Margaret waited for Sir Gerrard.”
Disregard my previous reply. Th new word count should be 158.
Thanks, Reg
LikeLike
Such a visual scene; you do a great job of pulling your reader in to feel the screams and the harsh breaths. I enjoyed your edited endings, but I actually liked the first one the best, because the deathly silence contrasts so, so vividly with the clamor of the entire beginning. Excellently done.
LikeLike
Thank you Tamara, after leaving it for a while and coming back to it, I like the first one too. I was was trying to imply that Sir Gerrard was the angel in the picture and that he would still be charged with protecting the villagers even after death.
Perhaps a better ending would have been: “In deathly silence, Margaret sat and waited for Sir Gerrard.”
Thanks again. I really appreciated your feedback.
Reg
LikeLike
What a most-excellent battle scene. Poignant last line. Nice work.
LikeLike
I cleaned it up a bit, hopefully the deadline hasn’t passed, lol. (it;s been
Sir William stumbled and nearly fell as he sidestepped the battle axe closing in on his helm. When the marauder overreached and became unbalanced, Sir William seized the advantage and buried his sword to the crossguard. Wrenching his sword from the marauder’s bowels, Sir William whirled and met another incoming blow. Using the pommel of his sword, Sir William smashed the marauder’s face with relentless fury.
Around him the world raged as mercy was forgotten. Steel sang as it bit though armor and into flesh. Men screamed as steel severed limb and life. Compassion and humanity were lost to the violence of the frenzy.
Picking up the bloodied banner Sir Gerrard once held in his now lifeless hand, Sir William urged the knights on. Stepping over the dead, Sir William and the remaining knights purged the village they had sworn to defend of the last marauders.
In deathly silence, Margaret sat and waited for Sir Gerrard
156 words.
LikeLike
Unraveled
Morning came, predictably, as an encasement to this weary life. The moon was trapped within another daybreak, visible to the naked eye, and I found a gnawing within myself. Here tethered to this earth, a shroud of invisible shackles bound me, and the moon was almost mocking in its own misery.
Silence is loudest with the absence of chatter, but the mind won’t stand for quietude. The mind wants chaos to fester, to tug you deep into the gallows of your own past. Where the innocent girl pleas with passionate stars, but none are brave enough to answer.
My hands were wrought and worn from unsuccessful clawing at the cloaked beast within, a most skilled and dangerous foe. Soma and psyche raged war as the sun rose and set, but the mocking moon wasn’t as predictable. It whispered sacred oaths, and I knew time was coming to a close.
I’d worn my heart thin, and scarlet cuffs bore my shame.
@blackinkpinkdsk
160 words
LikeLike
Poetry: “Soma and psyche raged war as the sun rose and set, but the mocking moon wasn’t as predictable.”
LikeLike
Thank you , kindly!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ooh, I love this line: “Silence is loudest with the absence of chatter, but the mind won’t stand for quietude.” Beautiful imagery, but then I tell you that every week, right? 😉 Still true. Well done, Grace!
LikeLike
Thanks so much, Tamara! It’s always nice to know what someone thinks when we pour our words out on a screen. Thank you for always reading and taking the time to comment.
LikeLike
This piece makes me feel something, and it is quite easy to identify with the character. Very nice work.
LikeLike
This is the best comment one could read. We always hope to make a reader feel something as a writer. Thank you!
LikeLike
Strong imagery ‘scarlet cuffs bore my shame’. Do I detect a touch of the werewolf here is that just me going to my darker place? Lovely work.
LikeLike
Haha. Not a werewolf this go around. The slow unraveling of a woman’s mind. Though, that’s the beauty we all read different stories from the same books. Thank you for the lovely comment!
LikeLike
Blew me away. Your story throbbed with ache and it rattled my soul. A profound tale written with the elegant hand of a master storyteller.
“Silence is loudest with the absence of chatter.”
“Where the innocent girl pleas with passionate stars, but none are brave enough to answer.”
“Scarlett cuffs bore my shame.”
Bravo! And if you have a spare tissue, I need to dab my eyes.
LikeLike
Your comments always inspire me to write better. Thank you for the continued encouragement and kind words!
LikeLike
Re-Annuciation
(160 words)
Gabriel had a problem.
In the last 48 hours he’d had a half-eaten cheeseburger thrown at him, a Rottweiler sicced on him, a straight razor wielded at him, and three police reports filed against him.
The solstice deadline buzzed about his skull, and he muted it by chain drinking Amaretto sours in the only bar still open after two. He’d come with three potentials—presuming he was being cautious for having backups. Now, he had no one. The first time had been so much easier.
=====
The gent’s soulful expression (and divine cut of his posh overcoat) marked him as client material.
“You look like you could use a little company,” Marianne purred, sliding into the booth. Vinyl creaked under her garters.
When she introduced herself, the gent stared at her with cerulean eyes. He leaned across scored varnish. “May I ask something… unusual?”
The earnestness in his angelic voice made her giggle. “With eyes like those, honey, I’ll do anything.”
@rowdy_phantom
#flashdogs
LikeLike
Love this take! So cute. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
*Dreamy sigh* Cerulean eyes. 😉 I love the style of this, such a fluid narrative. You’re such a versatile writer; this is different from a lot of your other work, but just as skillful. Bravo!
LikeLiked by 1 person
This piece is amazing. Your writing style is so effortless to read and yet I feel I’ve read volumes. Very nice piece. Favorite line – “Vinyl creaked under her garters.”
LikeLiked by 1 person
I liked your reference ‘divine cut of his posh overcoat’ with its overtones of the angelic although he seemed to be getting up to some very un-angelic mischief! Also using the name Marianne with its symbology for France. Great story. A pick up with a difference.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love it! “he muted it by chain drinking Amaretto sours in the only bar still open after two” is such a great image. Great story.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yesterday’s Tomorrow.
@CliveNewnham – 160 words
Black smoke roils switching off the stars while the surrounding buildings glower, blindly watching our sightless subservience. Another truck arrives to penetrate the fence of government guards, uniformed and helmeted in black, that protect. The truck tips its content over the asphalt.
Faces – a cast of orange shades – fall upon the dumped books and paintings, gathering them to carry to the raging source of light.
I lift a painting and recognise it. “Pierre!” I hiss. “This, it is a master.” He ignores my remark gathering armfuls of books, but I persist, “It is Jeanne, just before her death.”
“Don’t speak,” Pierre warns just beneath hearing. “Nobody dares hear you.”
“They say she was a witch.”
“There is no such thing.” With his hoard, Pierre waddles toward the fire and I follow.
Returning for more, I am separated from the others by two guards, taken out through the fence. The fires burn, the light dims – no such thing.
LikeLike
“sightless subservience” Nice!
LikeLike
Chilling! Gorgeous imagery, especially in the first couple of paragraphs: “Black smoke roils, switching off the stars.” I really enjoyed the twist ending. Nice job!
LikeLike
A mixture of good old-fashioned book-burning (eg papal) and a touch of the apocalyptic future a la Ray Bradbury. Nice take.
LikeLike
Teenage Kicks
@lizhedgecock
160 words
Open this door right now, young lady! You have overstepped the mark this time and no mistake! I know what you’ve been up to. Madame next door told me she saw you sneaking out in boys’ clothes. Now, when you’re becoming a woman, it is difficult. I appreciate that, I’ve been there. But dressing as a boy is not the answer. I don’t know where you get it from.
And as for going down to the garrison – you’re making a laughing-stock of yourself, my girl! Your poor father’s name will be mud if you carry on like this, and if he’s stood down from the watch – well, I don’t know how we’ll manage.
You need to start thinking about other people. What God – and I – appreciate is some good hard wool-spinning, not you passing on breaking news from the saints. Why on earth would they talk to you?
There’s no use sulking!
Jeannie!
Jeannie?
Jacques, she’s gone again…
LikeLike
Cute 🙂
LikeLike
I like the premise; you carried it off smoothly completely from the mother’s point of view. Those last three lines put a nice bow on a well-wrapped package. Got a good laugh out of it.
LikeLike
Had never considered what her Mother must have gone through. Nice take on the prompt.
LikeLike
Just like today – almost! Like the idea that God appreciates wool-spinning. And … there she goes .. Great story.
LikeLike
Fate’s Choice
She watched the battle play out in her mind’s eye; a reflection of the true events outside the dwelling she shared with her sisters. They, too, were busy weaving a myriad of similar threads into the tapestry. Already the threads of the future were gathering; the seemingly inevitable outcome of the battle and its aftermath. Her tears burned, streamed, dripped with every thread she severed. With every soldier that fell. She spotted him through the swirling veil of past-present-future. The one she had saved at birth by not cutting the thread. The one she had grown to love. This was to be his last battle; she saw it in her sisters’ eyes. She took his thread, and paused.
“There has been enough death today.”
The dark, uncut thread glimmered gold and spread, changing the pattern even as they worked it, flooding it with light. And, for the first time, she saw the beauty of mercy in her work.
Words: 158 http://www.hersenskim.blogspot.com @CarinMarais
LikeLike
Beautiful imagery of time switching events. 🙂
LikeLike
Thanks! 🙂 Glad you enjoyed it.
LikeLike
This is A nicely woven piece. 😉
LikeLike
Haha! Thanks! 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
Fate can be merciful. I felt sorry for her having to cut the threads of life, responsible for so much death. Nice story.
LikeLike
Thanks!
LikeLike
Oh, I really enjoyed this – a different take. I’d love to know more of this story.
LikeLike
Thanks, Margaret! There may be some more of this story in the future… 😉
LikeLike
“Thou Shalt Not Kill”
The angel smiled. “You’re not going to get into Heaven like this.”
“What am I supposed to do now? Will God free me from this post? Make my flesh impervious to fire?”
“That’s not how He works. He helps those who help themselves.”
“But I did everything I was asked to do. So many lives, so much pain. I was promised martyrdom.” I paused, not to fight back tears, for I had long ago lost the ability to cry. “I was promised peace.”
“Yes you were, but by whom? Not by Him, who has the power to grant such things.”
“You promised me.”
“Yes, I did.” He laughed. “Wisdom comes to us all, doesn’t it, even if it takes until our funeral pyre? Maybe you’re not quite as dumb as I thought.”
The torches came for me now, and the bonfire came alive. The last thing I smelled on this earth was brimstone, and He made sure I burned forever.
160 words
@drmagoo
LikeLike
Oh goodness, creepy!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh wow. This is chilling. Nice work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
The devil is at it again this week. Great story.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, creepy. And sad.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ring Of Fire
143 words
@TinmanDoneBadly
They had asked for a simple flyer to promote their show.
But their printer Eugene was an artist at heart, as all French are. He set out to create a poster that spoke not of a mere circus, but rather heralded a mystical, dream-inspiring, soul-thrilling experience.
Obviously therefore the picture could not include clowns.
Instead he showed Claude, the stick-swallower, helmet firmly in place to prevent the stick coming out through the back of his head. He showed Etienne, the trapeze-artist, his expression captured, as was his heart, in aching yearning for the star of the show.
This was Joan, a fire-eater of such skill that arc-welding is named after her to this day. She was pictured in all her smouldering beauty, proudly holding her oil-soaked torches.
And with her right fist pressed to her chest to try to ease her permanent heartburn.
LikeLike
Ahhh! That explains the Arc welding! I got a good chuckle over that one!
LikeLike
“ease her permanent heartburn.” Teehee! She definitely looks like she is enduring some kinda burn 😉
LikeLike
LOL!
LikeLike
@stellakateT
148 words
Thoughts
He was a real pain in the neck, forever whispering in my ear whenever I had lurid thoughts. Well not exactly lurid but things that I would have to confess to Monsignor McDougal. I would die before I could say the things that I thought. I love running barefoot through the fields, I love the sun on my face, I want to lead men into battle for God and my country. I know the last one is really scary, enough for the men in white coats to arrive and cart me off to the nearest institution.
Ever since I read about Joan of Arc I’ve had these thoughts, I joined the Army to stem these feelings. I’m one of the boys now I drive a tank and drink beer. I swear like a trooper. The voice in my head is always him. It’s God I know it is.
LikeLike
Oh Stella, this is awesome! That last line moved me to tears…
LikeLike
Makes me want to run barefoot through fields too. 🙂
LikeLike
Lining up the MC’s desires like that is brilliant, drawing in my sympathy, then whoa! Also, the final note, the desperate assurance, is pitch perfect.
LikeLike
I know this is you. You’ve got to get back on those tablets, Stella. And no you can’t have a tank! It’d be a nightmare to parallel park and doesn’t leave much room for groceries. 😉
LikeLike
ha ha this is the best comment I’ve ever had. You know me so well. My parallel parking is legendary 🙂
LikeLike
Beautiful. Painful. The narrative has a tinge of desperation to it that worms its way right into your reader’s mind and connects with such a firm rigidity. This is one I’ll be thinking about for a long time. Lovely.
LikeLike
That’s one way of dealing with the voice in your head! Great story.
LikeLike
Title: Hold that Pose
words: 157
@Rtayaket
“How much longer do we gotta hold these poses? This harness has given me a wedgie the size of the Grand Canyon.”
“Shut up, John, no one wants to hear where your underwear is going! At least you ain’t in heavy armor that covers your entire body up to your face! I’m roasting in here. It’s like this fire on the backdrop is literally cooking me.”
“Will both of you quit your whining? I’ve had to put drops in my eyes seven times to keep them this wide.”
“Yea Katie, sitting down for twelve hour portraiture is hard. At least Alex and I are actually posing for this painting.”
“Lay off her, John, Katie didn’t know they only wanted her here for her bug eyes! Haha!”
“You guys are so mean!”
“Alex is only saying that because he likes you.”
“John you rat! I’m gonna kill you!”
“…What?”
“Can’t punch me, Alex! You’re gonna ruin the painting.”
LikeLike
So much of this made me laugh! It’s happening in front of me. 🙂
LikeLike
Nice bit of humour here.
LikeLike
Heavenly Desire
156 words
personalvapes@gmail.com
“You know what I ask,” Michael whispers seductively in my ear, his hot breath tickling its way down the back of my neck. “You know you want to.”
His velvety, angelic voice sends a frisson down my spine. His soft-spoken request is the brush of downy wings tickling every hair on my body to stand erect, rigid, eager to give in to the raging desire pulsing through my soul. I can feel the desire…the want…slide down the length of my body to pool in my chest.
The sibilant hiss of my pulse pounding in my ears chants “Yess, yesssss, yessssss,” in time with my wildly beating heart as this ache of desire threatens to consume me in the heat of its crescendo.
The Archangel requests I give my life for King, for God, for the greater good as the wailing trumpets herald in a new day of flame and retribution.
Today, I die for my country.
LikeLike
Quite steamy and intensely patriot!
LikeLike
Hmm, I think someone’s impersonating Michael–and the hiss of pulse along with the steamy seduction gives me a hint as to which angel it might be. Well done.
LikeLike
I’m having fun playing with styles… Obviously, this week is a romance theme. Probably because I’m in the middle of a blog post about the most over-used words or phrases in your average bodice-ripper.
LikeLike
Is “Yes, Yesss, Yesssss” one of the overused phrases? 😉 Lol! Whew, let me get my pulse back down to normal and tell you that I thought you did an exquisite job with this. I especially like the last two paragraphs and how they skew the expectation just enough to grab the reader’s attention (ahem, should the reader’s attention be at all wandering at that point) with a sort of gripping stare that says, “Hey, THIS is what I meant.” Loved this. 🙂
LikeLike
Wow. Steamy! I’ve always thought that religious ecstasy could have an almost erotic quality to it, with its intensity, its passion. Love this take on the prompt.
LikeLike
Oh, interesting twist – I like the seductive language making us think one thing…and delivering another.
LikeLike
Talking with Angels
A.J. Walker
Adelina had ticks and talked to herself. She was usually easily avoided, today though I missed her approaching from behind
“Do the angels talk to you?” She said.
I did not answer, but she knew.
“They always talk to me.” Adelina said.
“All the time?” I said. “Are they with us now?”
Adelina nodded. “They are here. My angels are always near. You have an angel too. She’s good for you.”
I have never heard an angel.
“Have you ever really listened?” Said Adelina, as if reading my thoughts. “She is here now and she says ‘listen’”
She would.
“That’s good.” I said, trying to formulate an escape. Hoping my phone would ring.
“We are at war, you know?” Adelina said. “And yet you do not fight.”
I shrugged, wondering which war she was referring to.
“Our angels say we should pray together Jean.”
“You know my name?”
“Of course, your angel told me.”
(160 words)
@zevonesque
#FlashDogs
LikeLike
Nicely done. 🙂
LikeLike
I love these characters and this interaction. I want More. Great work.
LikeLike
Title: Kicking up dust
@tamrogers
Word Count: 155
Yesterday, I ate an angel.
All dusted pink and golden-hearted caramel.
Spear; sugar-spun and cut gums.
Wings; truffle and split cheeks.
Face; fondant and sneering.
Cut back and my heels are kicking up dust. Dust that glitters in the early morning sun like tears at midnight.
The day goes; drugs store, grocers, stares, smirks.
And then it’s dark and you don’t see the dust no more but instead the lights and the crowds and the bars.
And all the faces are full of shiny and happy and pills.
And they’re shiny and happy but it’s all arm’s length, behind a screen. Because I should be drinking and leering and ripping the tights off not putting them on.
And their shiny and happy smashes the screen and their angel faces smile behind candy-coated fists.
And today, grit sticks to my lips, bones cut my flesh.
Today, my heels are broken.
Today, the angels taste of dust.
LikeLike
Best. Opening line. Ever.
LikeLike
Wow, thank you 🙂
LikeLike
This is gritty – disjointed…the kind of story that grabs you by the throat and forces your eyes across the words.
You caught me off guard with the opening line and dragged me along a pathway to your own private hell.
Well. Done.
LikeLike
Thanks so much! 🙂
LikeLike
What a story-frame; wow! First line, last line, and the journey in between. Seriously, one of the best ones on the board. So good.
LikeLike
Blimey, thanks so much – means a lot 🙂
LikeLike
Powerful and poetic. The images are mesmerizing. So good.
LikeLike
Thanks! 🙂
LikeLike
Yes. Best . Opening. Line. Ever. My oh my this was freaking brilliant and unique and I want more. Unbelievably good. Wow.
LikeLike
Ah wow, thank you so much! 🙂
LikeLike
This is powerful. Excellently executed!
LikeLike
Thanks Grace! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Tam, I’ve just caught up with this. Blown me away, really. It’s going to be re-read daily however, as it keeps tying nylon fishing line around my right ear and pulling me back. I can’t remember when that last happened. Wonderful!
LikeLike
Wow, thanks so much, means a lot! 🙂
LikeLike
For Today
146 words
@TinmanDoneBadly
She is beautiful, even in her grief.
They blew horns of hatred, loud trumpet blasts filled with anger at her faithlessness.
They whispered, whispered around her head, sibilant, spiteful hisses. They called her a witch, a jezebel, a whore.
They could not break her soul, could not break her spirit, so in rage they broke her heart.
They took her children.
Now she clutches her breast, trying to ease the dreadful ache, trying to understand, trying to see how God’s will has been served by her suffering.
She weeps, though she will not let them see. She mourns, and her friends mourn with her. A part of her has died, but she has not died. When the flames of their stake have faded to cold grey ash she will still live, a light for a dark and broken world.
She is beautiful, even in her grief.
LikeLike
“She is beautiful, even in her grief.” So poetic, Tinman
LikeLike